People Do Frightening Things to Cake

[apple_pathways]

So after rambling about cake over on ragdoll's journal, I decided that I needed a cake icon. To that end, I did an image search on google for "cake". It was then that I discovered that PEOPLE DO F'ED UP THINGS TO CAKE! (I say "to" cake rather than "with" cake, because I'd rather not implicate cake in these horrible atrocities. I LOVE YOU, CAKE!) The giant head in the picture is Oprah. (If you don't believe me, read the little nametag.) Who thought this was a good idea?

We shall be asking ourselves that a lot as we explore:



Now, I know there is a trend right now where anything can be a cake. "Hey, my husband likes repairing old lawnmowers!" BOOM, cake! "I love my cell phone!" BOOM, cake! "It's Halloween; what's creepier than a severed arm being devoured by rats?" You guessed it! CAKE! (Yep, this one is real.)

Even though I might not want to eat replicated body parts and vermin, it was the creator's intention for the cake to be gross and scary. So I'm not talking about the cakes that are kooky and weird on purpose, but rather those that can only be described as profound errors in judgment. Such as:

"You know what would be awesome as our cake? ME!" You got it: Bridezilla cake!	Ok, I see where they were going with this one; but did they really think this one out? Not only is the cake creepy as fuck, but you are going to have to CUT INTO YOUR NEWBORN BABY! AHHHH!
Yep; that's a chocolate gun on a cake. No: it's not for Halloween or some western-themed birthday party. (I found it on some creepy conservative blog.)	Speaking of creepy conservative blogs... (Yeah, this really doesn't need any commentary.)
Sometimes the cake itself is fine; and then props are added... This cake comes from the homepage of a local bakery. I debated including it until I saw that ALL OF THEIR CAKES ARE PHOTOGRAPHED WITH THIS CLOWN! (I still don't believe there are people alive who genuinely like clowns...)	Along the same lines, this was a delicious carrot cake, and then... I searched the web page I found this on for the context of the cake, but came up with jack. Baby shower? Birthday party? Creepy neo-pagan ritual? You decide! (My favorite part is that someone drew on hair with a marker...)

Comments

[sabriel75.livejournal.com]

Oh dear god, these are scary!

[apple-pathways.livejournal.com]

They are incredibly scary; cake should take out a restraining order!

[sabriel75.livejournal.com]

Tis agreed... how can it go about doing this or me doing this on its behalf! XD

[ladyelleth.livejournal.com]

Augh. Why do people do this? oO

To sweeten this a little, here are some pretty awesome cakes. :D

[apple-pathways.livejournal.com]

Who cakes! Those are awesome! I can't believe the TARDIS one that actually has an inside.

And LOL, I guess those carrot-riding babies are famous!

[sabriel75.livejournal.com]

The Who ones if you're speaking of the ones I have seen are indeed awesome and I plan on having one made for my daughter next year for her birthday. She loves David Tennant! :D

[apple-pathways.livejournal.com]

Your lucky daughter! Yeah, the link ladyelleth provided has some really elaborate, awesome cakes!

[nahara.livejournal.com]

HAHAHAHA! Holy crap. o_O

I don't... I just... NO WORDS.

I can't decide which is the worst. I mean, oh my god. Oprah Winfrey? MORE-UGLY-THAN-NORMAL RONALD REGAN? Vaguely phallic looking carrots with babies straddling them? People are actually really nuts. I mean really, the mind boggles.

[apple-pathways.livejournal.com]

And poor Cake ends up caught in the middle! ;)

Yeah, the most surprising thing is how little time it took me to find all of these.

[vivitchi.livejournal.com]

...WTF PPL. LOL. AND WTF.

I find the baby one particularly creepy. Dx

[apple-pathways.livejournal.com]

The baby cake is seriously F'ed up in so many ways! As I said: who wants to cut into a life-sized 3D representation of their newborn child? (The morbid part of me hopes the cake has some sort of red berry filling...)

[curlybeach.livejournal.com]

I love CakeWrecks, such a brilliant website - makes me cringe no end :D

[apple-pathways.livejournal.com]

I'd never seen it before, but it is all kinds of awesome. Funny cakes? Genius!

[jacknjill270.livejournal.com]

Man, what is wrong with Ronal Reagan's face? He looks like he's been left out too long in the sun or something. And the babies straddling the carrots is just plain creepy.

[apple-pathways.livejournal.com]

IKR? Whoever decorated that cake really had a great time detailing his jowls...