Things just aren't the same...

[apple_pathways]

On my old journal, I would post a lot more content in the form of essays or musings on various topics; I'm trying to get back into that. So, I have composed a List of Things I Remember Fondly From Childhood That Just Aren't the Same As an Adult. Feel free to add your own!


1. Amusement Park Rides:

There is nothing more exciting and joyous for a child than filling up on sugar and spinning around for a while. As a child, I could not get enough of the Tilt-a-Whirl, the Merry-Go-Round, and those swings that rise up and down in the air and make you feel like you’re flying.

Now, I get nauseous on a regular old analog-style swing. What happened?



2. Marshmallows:

For a kid, marshmallows are the epic perfection of sugar treatments, and s’mores are the crème brûlée of childhood. It still seems like a great idea to me: roasting marshmallows look fantastic, and they smell even better! And I still enjoy the art of slow-toasting my mallow to perfection on a stick over a fire. But the moment I take a bite, I taste disappointment; that, and diabetes.

3. Cartoons:

When I was 3 years old (1985), She-Ra was my hero. One Halloween I dressed up as her. The costume only came with a mask, a sword, and some wrist cuffs, so my mom had to improvise the rest of my costume.

She put me in a pink tutu I’d inherited from a cousin that was a couple sizes too big. And since it’s Michigan, I had to wear a coat, as well.

I don’t care; I still looked rad. (My little brother was He-Man!)

I was disappointed to discover that the cartoon does not live up to my memories of it. Nor do most of the cartoons I watched as a kid. I remember them being exciting and cool; I watch them now and realize they’re boring and violent. (Hard to pull both of those off at the same time, but yeah.) Even the Smurfs are really lame on re-viewing.

4. Snow:

Ok, I still love snow…until Christmas is over. Then snow can just F off, as far as I’m concerned!

As a child? Powdered magic. As an adult? Driving nightmare and cute boots-ruining inconvenience.

5. Birthdays:

There’s something pathetic about people who make a big deal about their birthday after a certain age. I know people who throw a fit if they have to work on their birthday. For me, the more I hype the day, the more disappointed I eventually become; if I have low expectations, then every greeting and card is just a bonus.

I think 21 is officially the last fun birthday. (I did have a really fun 22nd, but never mind…) A couple years ago I stopped rounding up. My birthday is January 23rd; if you ask me on January 22nd how old I am, I am going to say “I’m 28.” Not, “I’m going to be 29 tomorrow.”

The kids I tutor tell me, “I’m 6 and a half” three weeks after their sixth birthday.

For a hilarious rant that pretty much sums up my attitude to birthdays, check out this clip of Patton Oswalt. (WARNING: CONTAINS STRONG LANGUAGE!)

Comments

[curlybeach.livejournal.com]

It makes me kind of sad how underwhel,ing birthdays are, now. Even my 21st kind of passed me by (possibly because I had only just finished all my exams). Thing is, I try to make birthdays more fun by regressing to my childhood a little; I don't run around screaming 'IT'S MY BIRTHDAY, YAY!', but I do like to watch films I loved as a child, play silly games, and try to make myselg feel as young as possible. Maybe I have a Peter Pan complex :D

Congratulations for winning the second she_is_to_me challenge, by the way - you completely deserve it :)

[apple-pathways.livejournal.com]

Thank you so much! I am still grinning. *g* (See?)

If I have friends who like birthdays, I always do my best to make it special for them; I think my disappointment stems from the fact that my birthday is in the middle of January and always heralded by a massive blizzard. So I'm used to people canceling because the roads are bad, and not feeling up to much of anything because the weather is frigid.

So, yeah--I'm realizing I'm just a Birthday Grump and probably need to just get the hell over it!