Oh, fanfiction.net... *rolls eyes*

[apple_pathways]

First, I have to say that there will always be a place in my heart for ff.net, as it's one of the places where I first discovered fan fiction. There's a still a lot of awesome stuff there; it just can be really hard to find. (I tend to find an author I enjoy, then read all of their stuff and everything they've favorited. That tends to work.)

Anyway. I have an account there, and most of my (non-porn) stories end up there. The thing is, I'm used to posting my Amy/Rory Doctor Who fics, which are posted and then largely ignored. {We won't even go into how cranky I get when my stories that include The Doctor get more hits on AO3 than my (better-written, I think) Amy/Rory fics.}

Sherlock is an entirely different animal.

It hadn't occurred to me to put my first Sherlock fic for thegameison_sh up there, but when I was archiving my latest entry today I thought, why not? So I put both "Strange Bedfellows" and "Almost Anyone" (formerly called "Of Death and Dying") up yesterday.

"Almost Anyone" got two very lovely, very thoughtful reviews. I was pleasantly surprised, and responded right away to thank them. All good.

"Strange Bedfellows"? I don't know what is going on there. It's gotten about 10 "story alert" subscriptions, and the following reviews:



Review One:

"Oh pretty please add a couple more chapters!

Like John can't sleep because Sherlock kicked him or something...

But not slash.

Just a friend sorta thing..

Please!"


Review Two:

LOL!


Review Three:

I agree with the comment below! Rather than slash, just Sherlock being his incredibly irritating self. Typical things that kids get up to in hotels when bored. The floor is made of lava, randomly springs to mind! Haha. Because he really is just a big child who longs for anything to keep him from being bored.

This just made me laugh, we could all do with a good old funny fic. :)

I do hope you continue with this!


Review Four:

awesome story so far! i can't wait to read more!


First, the less problematic issue to address: what on God's green earth gave you the impression that I was going to write any more of this story? It's barely even a story, really: due to the nature of the challenge (a word limit of 750), the entries are necessarily light on plot. Here's what goes on in the story:

Sherlock and John miss their train. They have to get a hotel room, but OH NOES, there's only one bed available! John is feeling a little homophobic, but Sherlock goads him into sucking it up and getting a good night's sleep. THE END.

Where else am I supposed to go with this? And more importantly, was the original story so ABOMINABLY FLUFFY and terrible that "John can't sleep because Sherlock kicked him or something..." sounds like a fitting sequel?!? (Don't even get me started on the "the floor is made of lava" idea; I KNOW the person who suggested it must be very young, but I've never understood the desire to write grown men behaving as cute little children. That is, when it is OOC for them to do so.)

Not to mention the story is listed as "completed". (Really, I'm flattered that people signed up for a "story alert", but an improvement in their level of reading comprehension might help avoid future disappointment...)

Ok, I'm being a snotty brat, time to move on...

Now for the second issue: no slash? Really? I don't understand this weird phenomenon in fandom where people enjoy male characters cuddling, sharing a bed, tickle-fighting, braiding each other's hair, IDEK! but OMG, NO GAY SEX PLEASE! Where is this coming from? I find it incredibly troubling that the female view of men and masculinity is so...skewed!

I understand slash as fantasy and wish fulfillment. (Not entirely on a personal level, but I get what it does for other people.) This, I do not understand. And I'm having trouble putting into words just what it is that's bugging me.

Any thoughts? Ideas? SHOULD I GIVE THE PEOPLE THE SEQUEL THEY'RE CRYING OUT FOR? (I'm tempted to work in Jar Jar Binks somehow...)

I think I need to go lie down.

Comments

[rewindclunkplay.livejournal.com]

I hardly post anything on there anymore, it's getting ridiculous. People put it on alert when it's finished, favourite it but don't review, and then their reviews aren't reviews, they're just LOL!

my favourite reviews are from a Nico/Percy story I posted once from Percy Jackson:

you are a sick person for writing this
Lol, oh thanks bb <3

I mean I love Nico more than any other, but I also like stories about 'gays'.
I have to assume gays in in quotations because canon Nico and Percy are straight... at least I HOPE that's why.

This is the stupidest gayest perveted story i ever read this story sucks. Percy is straight and so is Nico and there cousins so gross.
NOT EVEN GONNA GO INTO THE FACT about the cousins... seriously, not gonna touch it.

This tears me apart,but this is the only percy/nico story that I HATE HATE HATE LOATHE! OK,I like the romance,but yeesh! A Very Percy Christmas is less intense than this!

You dishonored my favorite pairing and Percy by making him smoke and all the stupid cursing drives me nuts.

Thanks a lot.

Jerk.

ah well, this is what LJ is for <3

[apple-pathways.livejournal.com]

Oh good holy God! I would make some disparaging remark about teenagers, but then, you're a teenager and brilliant so I don't want to do you an injustice.

I don't generally write a lot of slash (unless it's strictly PWP for the kinkmeme), so I'm not used to weird, homophobic remarks being left for my fics.

I just...I don't even know why they want to READ the sort of crap they're requesting, let alone why they think I'd be willing to write it for them!

And now, I think I need to read this story to find out just what sort of sick, sick person you really are! (Seriously, link?)

[rewindclunkplay.livejournal.com]

if you wish, but I can't be held accountable for any feelings of revulsion! (also, to be warned, I do actually swear a lot in it)

http://www.fanfiction.net/s/5882001/1/old_casettes_and_cigarettes

oh and there used to be linebreaks but then they disappeared

[apple-pathways.livejournal.com]

Yeah, ff.net has some weird thing against formatting! I find it helps if I include letters in my section breaks, then the format weasels don't eat them.

I read your fic! It's not, if I may say, your best, but there are flashes of genius, like this line: He spouts nonsense words and tends to switch religions every few seconds.

Very clever! (Just to clarify: I think you are a fantastic writer, and as I've said before, I'm jealous of how good you are at only 17!)

You do say the word "fuck" about 18,000 times, but despire repeated clutching, my pearls are still intact. Phew! Close one. ;) Now I'm off to read the reviews people left. (Good for you for the author's note you left! You made your point very well.)

[rewindclunkplay.livejournal.com]

well it wasn't edited, as I'm sure you can plainly see xD

oh thanks :3

sometimes I forget that people in the world don't swear like I do and that I have a mouth that would make soldiers blush. It seems odd to me.

[apple-pathways.livejournal.com]

Ok, so I read all the reviews, and it seems that at least as many people loved it as flamed you for it!

Yikes! How dare you mention SMOKING in your fic! You could have had him shooting heroin into his eyeball and it wouldn't have inspired this level of vitriol.

sometimes I forget that people in the world don't swear like I do and that I have a mouth that would make soldiers blush.

I tend to curse a lot as well, especially when frustrated. And my brother is a Marine, so...yeah, he can work the word "fuck" into a sentence in ways you've never imagined. No worries!

[rewindclunkplay.livejournal.com]

That's why I wasn't bovvered lol. Haters gonna hate, and all that. The only thing that really bothered me was the negative comments about homosexuality aha.

[wldcatsprstr-14.livejournal.com]

Whenever I post there, they ALWAYS ask for a sequel. Even though all my fics are listed as "completed."

I've only ever gotten one "OMG NO GAY PLZ" comment on my fics. 99% of them have hardcore sex in them.

[apple-pathways.livejournal.com]

I guess what I find most offensive is the implication that I have written "fluff"! (I DO NOT DO fluff!)

(Ok, I do...but only in small doses! And only when the plot requires...) ;)

I think the "OMG, sequel!!!" comments are a part of the culture there. You don't see it as much as you used to, but it was very common to include threats in the summary such as "comment or i'm nott gong to write anymre!!!" I think a lot of authors think that's how it works--you keep writing as long as people keep commenting, and the story is finished when your readers lose interest.

What I find weird about the "no slash" requests is that they seem to want "a little gay, but not TOO gay; not GAY gay." *foreheadslap* I don't even know...

IS IT LOUSY REVIEW WEEK AROUND HERE?

[alt_universe_me.livejournal.com]

I just...I don't even.

First things first, I haven't read your Sherlock fics because I kind of got bored quickly with that fandom :( I liked the series and all, and I'll watch the next one when it comes out, but I only read a few fics right after watching and then...lost interest. I dunno why, I guess neither of the main characters/actors appeal to me nearly as much as my main fandoms.

ANYWAY, I've never posted anything on ff.net, but this is a good warning for me to stay away from there! Those reviews are awful--if they can even be called reviews. I mean, I get that they like your story and want to see more, but what part of 'oneshot' don't they get? I mean, I've had people ask for more on my oneshots, but they at least were polite about it and let me know what they liked about the story. And they didn't beg me for odd variations on my story either. I mean...John can't sleep because Sherlock kicks him? O_o

BUT! Speaking of lousy reviews, here's one that I recently got on my rather lengthy Torchwood WIP:

"grr come on Jack stop over reacting & remember what Ianto has been through. Feel nervous about Unit & what could happen if Ianto can't talk to Jack. When are you posting the next part?"

I mean--really? That was the whole review. And it was from someone that never reviewed before (on a fic that is now over 50k words). I don't mean to sound snotty either, but they could have at least let me know they liked it. And the whole 'When are you posting the next part?' I haven't responded to this comment, and I don't think I will, but if I did I would be very tempted to say: I WILL DAMN WELL POST THE NEXT PART WHEN IT'S WRITTEN ARGH.

So, yeah. Maybe I'm overreacting a bit, but that 'review' just sounded so entitled. I'm not holding chapters hostage--I haven't written them yet!

So, yeah, I know how you feel about those reviews. And I don't think you're being snotty at all :) And it's ff.net. You didn't promise anyone a sequel, so I would say just ignore them. I'm going to be ignoring the comment I got, anyway :)

Re: IS IT LOUSY REVIEW WEEK AROUND HERE?

[apple-pathways.livejournal.com]

Yeah, I'm sure if I've enjoyed a one-shot story from an author before, I've encouraged them to write more--either more with the same characters, same premise, in the same style, etc. But never dictating the plot as if I were posting a request on a prompt meme!

You don't have to feel bad about skipping my Sherlock fics; after all, I don't read your Torchwood fics! Different stroke, different folks, etc... And to be honest, I don't read a lot of Sherlock fic outside of the challenge I'm involved in. I'm not really into Sherlock/John as a ship (as a hardcore canon girl, I can't see Sherlock as anything other than asexual), and that seems to be the focus of 90% of the fic. Hence, why my story that's focused on those two characters is getting way more attention than the (again, I think, better written) Molly-centered fic.

As for the review you got: Geez, overinvest much? I don't even know what they were trying to say. You're right, why comment at all if not to say you liked something or to offer some constructive criticism?

As for "holding chapters hostage", that is par for the course in some fic communities. Some diva authors will pout and throw a fit and refuse to continue a story if their egos aren't properly stroked. I hate that culture, and it seems to abound on ff.net.

But, like I said, there's still some good stuff there, and I did get two very nice, very thoughtful reviews on one of my stories.

Re: IS IT LOUSY REVIEW WEEK AROUND HERE?

[alt_universe_me.livejournal.com]

Exactly--an individual writer is not a prompt meme!

The female character-centered fics usually don't get nearly as much attention as the male character-centered ones, which is sad. I got way more comments on my Rory/Eleven friendship fic than I got on my Amy/River friendship fic, and I would say that, while neither of them are especially brilliant, they are of comparable quality. However, I did just participate in a female-centered ficathon for Torchwood, which was really awesome. And at least in Doctor Who there are awesome female main characters. In Sherlock, the women got hardly any screen time or characterization. (Which is probably another reason why I lost interest in that fandom)

To be fair, the review I got did kind of make sense in context of the story. And my other reviewers did say some similar things--but the difference was, those reviewers have been reviewing since the first few chapters and have already let me know they enjoyed it. I think it's different when someone you don't even know pops up and asks when the next chapter is going to be.

But, I'm glad you got some nice reviews to go with the bad ones. And thanks for letting me vent with you :)

Re: IS IT LOUSY REVIEW WEEK AROUND HERE?

[apple-pathways.livejournal.com]

To be fair, the review I got did kind of make sense in context of the story.

Ah, see--without knowing the canon, I wasn't sure. And you're not wrong to be annoyed, there's definitely an etiquette to offering criticism, and it's certainly jumping into the middle of a story with a grumble about the characters and a demand for more chapters!

You're definitely right about female-centered fics! I would attribute this phenomenon to the fact that most fandoms tend to be overwhelmingly female (and most of them heterosexual), and that's why the natural focus is on the men for romantic interest, but I fear there are darker forces at work. (You can tell it's getting late; my responses are getting progressively more dramatic!)

We'll have to talk more about female characters in fandom when it's not 1am and I'm hopped-up on cold medication! (I agree completely about the women in Sherlock.)

And thank YOU for venting with me! It made me feel much less shallow for complaining about people who only bothered to take the time to read something I'd written. ;)

[greta-garbo.livejournal.com]

I agree with you on the slash thing, which actually causes some problems for me because saying "I don't really enjoy random, non-canon slash all that much" has brought me reactions online ranging from "Why the hell not?" to "You're a homophobe."

Yeah, I really don't think I'm a homophobe. I love a good slash ship that's canon (Jack/Ianto own my Torchwood heart and Gwen can go die in a fire) or where, even if it's not canon, the two actors have an undeniable, if completely unintentional, sexual chemistry.

But it must be some strange kink thing/weird and misshapen view of masculinity and male interaction that has some people automatically ship slash for seemingly no reason at all. It's like, "Oh, well those two guys fight all the time. That means they secretly want to bang" and "Oh, those guys are nice to each other and enjoy one another's company. That means they secretly want to bang." Which basically means, in some people's minds, that ALL MALE CHARACTERS IN TELEVISION WANT TO HAVE SEX WITH EACH OTHER. What? Really?

[greta-garbo.livejournal.com]

And I got so into that that I totally forgot the second part of what I wanted to say...

But I also agree about the people who flip over slash, as if they have only just stumbled upon the concept and can't believe it, are ridiculous. For one, if you're AT ALL active in internet fandom, you know the fact of slash. Stop acting like your little innocent eyes have been molested by this new and tawdry phenomena.

If you don't like slash, you should probably read the description, look at the pairing, and NOT READ IT. SERIOUSLY, WTH? It's like over on Rotten Tomatoes, when people enter threads just to make a post about how stupid the thread is and how much they hate it. THEN WHY DID YOU CLICK ON IT?

And I don't know what the problem is with people reading slash where there is no slash. It's just downright paranoid homophobia. Folks, if it's just two guys from the same show interacting, much like they do on the real show, the writer is not trying to display their deep secret love for each other. If it doesn't contain something about eyes locking and deep passions or something, it probably ain't slash. So calm the hell down.

[apple-pathways.livejournal.com]

Again, the idea that all male characters on television want to have sex with all other male characters on television is something that doesn't appeal to me on a personal level, but I get how other people enjoy it.

I suppose what I REALLY don't get is the need to pair off every single character ever and make everything about sex. It's not just that I don't have slash goggles; I don't have ship goggles! I don't feel the need to pair up any and all unattached characters and write them into a romance. I'm perfectly willing to let characters who are friends just be friends. (It's very telling that the main ship I write, Amy/Rory, is a canon married couple. Even Molly/Jim is canon!)

Of course, you can file this all under the category of "things that don't resonate with me on a personal level but I'm perfectly Ok with."

I mean, people should write and seek out whatever they enjoy! It's just there are certain ideas I can't wrap my head around, and I can't help but speculate at the motives behind them. (Of course, trying to ascertain the motives of fandom is certainly a dark and winding path one should avoid at all costs!)

All of this is why I want to see some comprehensive sociological research done on slash and its function in fan culture. Think I can get a grant for that? ;)

[roh-wyn.livejournal.com]

First off, I will never get why people want sequels when the summary of the fic says "one-shot" and "complete". I always angst over whether this implies the story doesn't work as a one-shot, or maybe readers don't feel it's finished. And then I stop wringing my hands and move on, lol. In other words, if you don't feel like there's more story to tell, please don't bother writing a sequel.

As to OMG NO GAY thing, I will never get why people are alright with "Sherlock and John should cuddle, but just like friends". I can't think of any guys who know who cuddle like friends, lol. If readers are going to read slash, they cannot try to run away when they realize it's OMG GAY.

Weirdly, I've had the opposite experience. I wrote a het HP fic, and you would not believe the number of reviews I got that were basically "eeeeew, het, who even writes that anymore." *rolls eyes*

Oh, fandom. Never change. ;)

[apple-pathways.livejournal.com]

I have no intention of writing a sequel, even if my devious little brain keeps coming up with all sorts of hilarious ways to torture my "readers"...

I can't think of any guys who know who cuddle like friends, lol.

This is the issue I was sort of dancing around. I don't know any men who hunker down for a good, friendly cuddle with other men, either. If there are any out there who want to, then by all means, they should! Far be it from me to reinforce traditional gender roles. But the severe OOCness of some of the fics I've read, with grown men acting like angsty pre-teen girls... Well, let's just say "not for me!"

Yeah, I've seen "Eww, het!" in other fandoms, too; it all depends on the popular trend. At the moment, I write for two fandoms: Doctor Who and Sherlock, and I don't write for the "popular" genres in either. My "Sherlock and John share a bed" fic is the closest I've come to writing for a popular pairing (even though the fic is, technically, gen), and I'm just weirded out by the attention it's getting. I'm much more used to writing weird Frankenstein/Doctor Who crossovers that are mostly ignored by the fandom at large!

[jacknjill270.livejournal.com]

The comment suggesting that you should continue with John being unable to sleep because Sherlock kicks him made me laugh and laugh. Better yet, two fully grown men jumping on the furniture pretending the floor is made of ~LAVA~. Oh, fanfiction.net, how so crazy?

I started off reading at ff.net too, but for a different fandom. The divas that hold the next chapter of their fic hostage unless they get a certain amount of comments seem to be pretty universal on that site, unfortunately. I think the age of the average reader/writer on ff.net is considerably younger than on lj or other fannish-oriented sites which is why you end up with comments like those. (floor made of lava, lololol! That still cracks me up. WHAT IS THIS I DON'T EVEN)

[apple-pathways.livejournal.com]

I did get a good, hearty chuckle out of those "reviews" before I started to get all huffy and diva-ish! Are they watching the same show I'm watching? SHERLOCK HOLMES DOES NOT JUMP AROUND A HOTEL ROOM PRETENDING THE FLOOR IS MADE OF LAVA!

I mean, if that's the sort of story they want to read, fine: I certainly have some weird tastes in fic. But what in the world makes them think that I should write it for them?

I've read for tons of fandoms on ff.net, and some are crazier than others. Most of the reviews I've received for my Who fic there (which, mind you, aren't many: I think at least half have no comments) have been totally sane.

I think what I enjoy most about LiveJournal is this expectation that you will interact. There's an expection of dialogue which necessitates you have something to say, and that tends to weed out a lot of the drive-by "LOL" comments. (NOT universally true; there are some horrific LJ comms out there, but I love the little niches I've carved out for myself!)

[ladylovelace.livejournal.com]

You know, either a lot of people have recently taken up the notion that a romantic friendship is better than a sexual relationship (unlikely), or the weird spate of anti-gay sentiments coming at them from the media is starting to affect their brains.

Admittedly, there is a part of me that would be slightly disturbed to see Benedict Cumberbatch and Martin Freeman actually have sex, but then that is rather the point of fantasy, is it not?

I feel for you with the sequel requests. The number of people who basically leave 'awesome, write more' comments is overwhelming. Why can they not appreciate what they got? (I mean it's awesome that they want to read more of your writing, but maybe a comment on the actual fic..?)

[apple-pathways.livejournal.com]

"Romantic friendship"--that's a good way to describe it. It seems to be a genre that's sprung up around me, and I never noticed. I'd like to believe these are all asexuals looking to satisfy their preferences, but like you, I'm afraid it has much more to do with some dual fascination with/repulsion to slash.

And yes, I am definitely flattered that they want to read more of my writing. Only...I'm not sure they DO want to read more of my writing, because the scenarios they're suggesting for a sequel do not at all match the story I've written! Unless I'm massively misreading my own writing, I wrote a story with two grown men acting the way grown men in a particular situation might. So where does the "OMG, the floor is LAVA!" suggestion come from? Do you suppose she makes that suggestion to everyone author she reviews, in hopes of finding one who'll bite?

[ladylovelace.livejournal.com]

I am greatly fond of the whole romantic friendship genre, but I wouldn't suggest it by saying 'no slash'. In fact, I wouldn't suggest it because you didn't ask for suggestions, but otherwise it looks like the new generation of people who see slash as edgy and forbidden. I hope. Because that can be fixed.

The lava floor bit I am just completely perplexed by.

I am just reading a lot of youth in all those comments, and would be terrified to learn that any of them were left by adults (because of the clarity of expression, or lack thereof, if nothing else).

[apple-pathways.livejournal.com]

It all boils down to motives, doesn't it, the absolute hardest thing to determine?

The charitable part of me expects that these young girls (and like you, I am assuming they are mostly young girls) wants to see their favorite adult male characters behaving like young girls because, well, it's what's most familiar to them! Adult relationships are beyond them at this point, and they're much more familiar with affection in terms of playful friendship than adult romantic love, and therefore rather than read about realistic adult relationships they'd rather watch two grown men tickle fight.

I don't know. My opinions about the feedback I've received have morphed from "OMG, how dare they!" to "Aww, aren't they sweet!" I think it was too late last night for me to feel charitable.

[nahara.livejournal.com]

This is how I feel about most of my reviewers at FF. Net...



I hate when they ask for more and I'm like... but that's the end. There isn't more. >:(

[apple-pathways.livejournal.com]

LOL! Oh, I need your icon, because that is exactly what I'm doing...sulking! I can be such a petulant child sometimes.

I think I need to relax down and just be happy that people are reading the rubbish I write. ;)

[ladymercury-10.livejournal.com]

As a college student, I would just like to say that not only is "The Floor is Lava" a suitable game for adults, that it can be played any time, especially when you should be tutoring math.

But no, I have no idea why Sherlock and Watson would play it. Hahahaha.

[apple-pathways.livejournal.com]

Sherlock and Watson would play because they're repressing their secret gay love for each other, and just want the excuse to fall together in a giggling heap on the floor! Or else it's their totally heterosexual and manly bromance that involves lots of tickling and hand-holding...

I dunno, I can't keep this fandom straight! ;)

(Oh, that was almost a really bad pun...)